\"Let Them\" Whose Idea Was It?

So everyone by now has heard of Mel Robbins' ‘The Let Them Theory’, but is it really her theory? It has come to my attention that ‘Let Them’ was penned by an author Cassie Phillips as a poem that went viral in 2022 and started a ‘Let Them’ Movement.

And where did Cassie get the idea? Was it from the sermon by Bishop TD Jakes' ‘Let Them Walk’ almost 30 years ago? Or from Oprah who also shared 'Just Let Them Miss You' 20+ years ago.

Are there any original ideas? I don’t know.

But where is the line between being sparked by an idea and stealing or plagiarizing someone else's work?

Well, I could see how Oprah was sparked by TD Jakes, and how Cassie could have been sparked by Oprah and/or TD Jakes. And any one of them could have heard ‘Let Them’ from any number of people. Think of ‘Let Go and Let God’, or the ‘Serenity Prayer’. But Mel? Did Mel really believe she came up with the idea on her own? In her supposed two years of research, and writing the book, did she never come across Cassie Philips, or Oprah, or TD Jakes, or anyone else who may have shared a version of “Let Them’? I find it hard to believe, but maybe.

Maybe she didn’t see anything or anyone else in her research. But, what about her second and more important part of the theory “Let Me”. Cassie also wrote a follow-up poem entitled “Let Me” which she released a month after her ‘Let Them” poem and was a big part of her movement.

And maybe, just maybe Mel didn’t see any of that in her research. But, since she shared on her podcast and then again in her book, hundreds if not thousands of people have reached out to her about this perceived plagiarism. And Mel has yet to address it, except to say that it is ancient wisdom. Why is that, if she is about empowering people? Empower the one who started the movement.

I think the theory is important, I don’t think the theory belongs to either Cassie or Mel, however. I do think that Mel as an influencer, and self-help “guru” should have referenced Cassie and or the fact that she did not create this theory, as she now claims. She could have empowered Cassie by holding her up and sharing together, or at the very least reference Cassie and her movement. Do something that acknowledges those who came before you.

I want to say, I get it, it is easy to get caught up in an idea. I first heard about Brooke Castillo’s CTFAR method, I loved it and I tweaked it and I created the Empowered Action Method from it. Now was it Brooke’s idea? No, it has been around since at least the 1950’s, but she made it a coaching model that is used by many. I reference her when I talk about it, and one time when I forgot, someone called me out on it and I corrected it. That is what you do, you give credit where credit is due, but also I want to live in a world where we Empower each other, especially other women. That is the World I want to be a part of.

Mel claims to be the originator of the theory, where she came to realize it at her son’s prom, yet she posted about it on May 19, 2023, that she has just heard about the ‘Let Them’ theory and then in the book she says it “came to her’ at her son's prom. She also talks about researching it for two years, but she only learned about it in May of 2023 and released the book in October 2024, and she was not researching it when the publishers had it, so at best, only a year of research “could” have happened. So, where did she get it from? Did she research it? What was she researching if it “came to her”?

After Cassie Phillips got her ‘Let Them’ tattoo, many who were following her movement got similar tattoos. Mel talks extensively about the “Let Them‘ tattoos that her theory has inspired, and yet it wasn't her at all. Maybe she believes that they came from her book, and not the actual tattoo that Cassie got, yet all the images I could find for 'Let Them' tattoos referenced Cassie Phillips or her poem.